The Onion
Day 27 after signup
Mom Making Her Birthday All About Her
MORE | The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Elizabeth Holmes
Why it works
- Lead with distinctive editorial headlines so the roundup feels like content first, rather than a sales message.
- Place promotional calls to action between groups of stories to keep them visible without interrupting every headline.
- Use concise headlines and clear section labels to make a varied digest easy to scan.
How it is built
- Issue date
- Satirical headline roundup
- Membership promotion
- More headline stories
- Media and newsletter promotions
- Preferences footer
Email copy
View this email in your browser Thursday, October 22, 2026 LOCAL Mom Making Her Birthday All About Her AMERICAN VOICES Surgeons Amputate Wrong Leg ENTERTAINMENT Nathan Fielder Quietly Deletes Footage Of Theranos Machine Working Perfectly JOIN AMERICA’S FINEST MEMBERSHIP BASKETBALL Pelicans Announce Upcoming ‘Basketball Night’ AMERICAN VOICES Fired General Warned Of Missile Shortages Before Iran War LOCAL Plan To Splurge Scrapped On Account Of Price SHOP AT THE ONION STORE NEWS The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Elizabeth Holmes LOCAL Man Racking Up Compliments After Taking Shower NEWS Historians Uncover New Evidence That Jesus Made Annoying Smacking Sound After Every Sip Of Wine WATCH TONIGHT: 8ET | 7CT | 6MT | 5PT When you find out how the dinosaurs really died, you might actually feel sorry for those stupid lizards. Watch the new episode of Nerve Center tonight and sign up for the InfoWars newsletter now. SIGN UP FOR THE INFOWARS NEWSLETTER JOIN AMERICA’S FINEST MEMBERSHIP Copyright (C) 2026. All rights reserved. Global Tetrahedron LLC dba The Onion · 2045 W Grand Ave Ste B PMB 479693 · Chicago, Illinois 60612-1577 · USA You are receiving this email because you opted in via our website. Not interested in hearing from us? You can update your preferences or unsubscribe